Sutton (let's pretend we're on a first name basis) brought along with her another Broadway star, Megan McGinnis. They performed in Little Women together, and their voices sounded so amazing together.
Megan sang a song from her new musical, "Daddy Long Legs" and talked about it a little bit beforehand. It's the story of an orphan girl, who is sent to college by an anonymous benefactor, and his only request for her to continue going is to write him a letter each month chronicling her life there. The song she sang comes after a particularly bad day, and she quoted a line from the play that struck me right in the soul:
"It isn't the big troubles in life that require character. Anybody can rise to a crisis and face a crushing tragedy with courage, but to meet the petty hazards of the day with a laugh—I really think that requires spirit."
The words so quickly went from ears to my heart, that I barely had time to figure out why. It wasn't until this morning, when I was still thinking about them, that I asked myself why. Thinking about everything that I've had to deal with, and the "crushing tragedy" that I had faced, I wondered if I even believed this sentiment at all.
But I find truth in it, and I find strength from it. In retrospect, it was relatively easy to convince myself that things would be okay after Josh passed. I know that we will see each other, and I even know that he is watching over us just as much as he can. That doesn't mean that it isn't still hard every day though, and I guess that's kind of the point. We can get these big, meaningful answers to big meaningful questions, but the day to day trials can seem so frustrating when we're in them.
I remember packing to go to Disneyland with the Robisons in March, and I couldn't find something small that I needed, like a shirt or something, and at the time it made me so angry. I was yelling to nobody about how unfair it was. "Really?! After everything I've been through!! I can't just find my stupid shirt without tearing this room apart?!?!" It all seems very silly now, but it was a big deal to me when it was happening. And even now, sometimes I catch myself (or more likely, my loved ones catch me) being grouchy or rude, and ask me what's up, and I can't even give an answer. I sit there and think about it and realize I'm being a jerk without even feeling any kind of malice toward anyone or anything. I'm just annoyed because I want to change the channel, but the remote is next to the television.
My favorite joke these days, especially when I'm getting particularly worked up over something, is to say "This is the WORST THING that's ever happened to me." It makes people give me funny looks, and it makes me remember that spilling juice on my shirt is far from tragic.
I would like to be the kind of person who can meet the petty hazards of the day with a laugh. To have that spirit that not only says that I can do hard things, but I can deal with annoying things, and I can do it with a smile on my face.
