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Friday, February 21, 2014

Jefferino


Hello, friends! Welcome to this very special ONE HUNDREDTH blog post. How momentous and exciting! I feel like there should be fireworks. Here we are.


I'm not sure why or how they are ejecting directly out of Big Ben,
but everything about this gif pleases me. I dig it to infinity.

I knew I was getting close to this point, and I wondered what I could ever write about that would be important enough because it seems like a big deal for some reason. Fortunately I happen to have something really awesome to talk about, so get super ready! 

Let me tell you about this clown:

His name is Jeff and he is my brother. Technically, he's Josh's brother, but I mostly against the term "in-law"
these days, as I mentioned last time. I love all my brothers so much, but right now I just want to talk about Jeff.

I feel like, and maybe it's just me, that Jeff and I have a special bond. It's probably just me. He's probably reading this right now and rolling his eyes at how cheesy and dorky that sounds. (Hi, Jeff!) Regardless, I believe it to be so.

The first time I ever saw him was when I went down to the Robisons' for Nate's farewell. I say "saw" and not "met" because I never actually spoke to him or was introduced the entire time we were there. He hid in his room and I assumed it was because he was in high school and obviously way too cool for his brother's friends. I did get to meet and hang out with the two youngest brothers, and I liked them instantly. They were in middle school and easier to impress, I guess.

But when I started dating Josh, and went to officially meet the family, I was already a little worried about the oldest brother at home, and whether he would acknowledge my presence this time.

It turned out he was just bummed about a basketball game that first weekend, because he was super friendly and not at all scary like I imagined! He was funny and goofy and officially declared that I was okay after I was a little too sarcastic with him. It was a great moment of triumph.

It didn't take long for me to realize that this was a really special kid. Yes, he does have a great talent for driving you up the wall (don't even say anything about being old around him, or he'll speak in an old grandpa voice the rest of the day) and making lots of jokes, but it is astounding how kind and full his heart is.

He's just a really unique person in many ways. He is a star athlete and it is so fun to watch him play any sport. It was the most fun to watch all the boys play basketball together, with the older brothers helping the younger ones to develop their skills, while also just beating up on each other. Jeff told a story at Josh's funeral about the first time he beat Josh in a game of one on one. I remember that game. I didn't even watch that game, but I remember how upset Josh was the rest of the day. He was always crazy proud of his little brother, and all he had grown up to be.

At our wedding, we didn't have a big reception line because we didn't feel like everybody coming in needed to talk to a huge group of people in a family they didn't know. At the reception in Flowell, it was the same. Here was the line: Me and Josh, my parents, his parents, and Jeff. Nobody asked him to stand with us, but he wanted to greet everybody and talk to all of them. I don't even know what character trait this is, but it's something that always stuck out in my mind.

He has always been super nice to me. So have all the Robisons, of course. You can tell that he just really cares about people. If he feels his friends need him, he is there in a second, even if it's just to sit with them while they're sad. That's probably why every high school student I meet likes him so much.

I always feel really protective of him, and I brag on him probably way too much. (Did you know he was nominated to be a McDonald's All-American in basketball?) We have a super cool handshake, and he doesn't even make me feel dumb for thinking that it's super cool. I feel like I can talk to him about anything, and I'm always reminding him that I'm here for him if he wants to talk. I think he thinks I'm a lunatic when I say that, because he's like, "ok..." He's obviously really strong, and I probably need his help way more than he needs mine.

He loves Logan so much. It just warms my heart every time I see them together. Before basketball games, he would never come over and talk to us, because he was too busy getting in the zone, I guess. The last few games when we've been there, he rushes over to hold his nephew and play with him before he has to go get changed. If that doesn't seem special, I don't know what does.

He is the one of the closest people to the spirit that I have ever met. He is always amazing me with the things he says and the insight he has. Many people got to see that side of him when he spoke at Josh's funeral. Lots of people have told me since then how impressed they were with him, like they couldn't even believe an eighteen-year-old kid could have such a great understanding of the gospel. I was and always am so proud of him.

In October of 2012, President Thomas S. Monson announced that they were changing the age that young men could go on missions from 19 to 18, provided they were graduated from high school. As soon as Josh and I heard that, we thought about Jeff. We knew he would be excited, and as soon as Josh called him he said, "I'm ready to go." He's has had a one track mind since that announcement. What was a little frustrating for him was that he turned 18 in August right as his senior year was starting, so he still had to wait a pretty long time to go, but he's been doing everything he can to prepare and be ready to serve as soon as he is graduated. Anyone who knows him knows how ready he is to serve and spread the gospel.

Yesterday, Jeff was called to the Mexico, Mexico City mission. I can not stress this enough. I am so proud of him. I believe the people of Mexico are the luckiest people on the planet to be able to meet him and learn from him. While it makes me pretty sad, because I'm going to miss him like crazy, I know, and so does he, that going on a mission is the absolute best place for him to be. He's going to love it and they're going to love him.

Jeff, you are one of my heroes. You probably don't even know how much you inspire and teach me every day. I am so honored to call you brother. Thank you for being you.


Friday, February 14, 2014

A letter to my Valentine

Dear kind wonderful Josh,

Happy Valentine's Day! I love you and miss you so much and I want to tell you why.

I love your smile.

I love that explosive laugh you sometimes did when you thought something was really funny.

I love that you think I'm really funny and I love that you're really funny too.

I love that you were always willing and so happy to hold my hand. Even if you were driving your Jetta and had to steer and shift with one hand which wasn't super safe, but it was super cute.

I love that you gave it your all when you sang in the car and would sing sappy, sweet love songs to me.

I love that I didn't even have to ask you to do something, all I had to do is mention I wanted something done and you would do it.

I love how you were always kind and generous and thoughtful and just wanted to make me so happy.

I love that "I love you" was such a major part of all our conversations.

I love that we had this conversation many times started by either one of us:
1:I love you!
2:I love you too!
1:No you don't understand. I LOVE you!
Because it was so frustrating to have all this love and joy and light and wonder in your heart for someone and only have those three small words to convey it, like they're not enough!

I love that sometimes you got irritated with my family when you thought they were teasing me too much. (Sorry, family)

I love that you love my family.

I love that my family loves you. They love you so much they don't want to call you brother-in-law, just brother, because they don't want to put that distance between you.

I love that I feel the same way about your family.

I love that it's like we weren't allowed to freak out at the same time. If you were concerned about what we would do for money, I would feel do calm and confident when I told you it would be all right. And then an hour later, I would be like, "no wait, what DO we do for money?!" And you would totally calm me down and reassure me it would be okay.
These days I do a lot of freaking out, but I know you're making sure we'll make it.

I love how you were really nervous about being a dad, but only because you wanted to do a really great job.

I love how when you held our son, you could tell how much you loved him and how happy you were.

I love how you always looked at me like you were so lucky to be with me and like you won the lottery, which is crazy because obviously I was the luckiest one.

I love you, Josh. I am so happy to be yours.

Your Valentine forever and always,

Erica

P.S. I love you.
P.P.S. No, you don't understand. I LOVE you.

Monday, February 3, 2014

Logan Joshua


Let me tell you about this concerned little dude.

First of all, I was trying really hard to catch him smiling in this picture.
So far in his life, he is very uncooperative.

Other things I've learned about him:
Favorite activity: eating or sleeping.
Least favorite activity: not eating or sleeping not in someone's arms.

It's weird that there's suddenly this human being who didn't even EXIST eight weeks ago, and now he's my main homeboy. And I like him a lot more than most people, I think, just based on how I let him treat me. Like take any of these situations and pretend it's not a person I created, and they wouldn't be my friend.

Dude, it's three in the morning! How 'bout let's sleep? No? All right then.

Are you trying to have a crying contest with yourself?

I got pooped on again.

I got peed on again.

He puked on me again. Like I don't even care.

It seems like such a miracle that I love him so much, but really it's not even hard at all. He's the best.

One smile from that kid, and you forget how hard it is every day to be a mom. Also, just being a mom is a magical thing. It makes me feel so important that I get to take care of this beautiful child. This morning my dad was holding him, and I walked into the room past him, and, guys, he turned his head to follow me around the room. It makes me tear up just thinking about it. Sometimes he's crying a lot, and he calms down just as he gets handed to me. How could that not make you feel so special? He's the cutest little guy that I have ever seen, and I am the most important person in the world to him. That's insanity.

Last of all, he's a little piece of Josh that gives to live and breathe and grow, and I am almost positive he will be just like his dad. He already doesn't know how to hold still ever.



This face. Am I right?